Still Not Sued!
 
 15 January 2008
Issue 15
Hilary Clinton Loses Key Vote in US Primary School

Hain Discovers that "Just Getting on with the Job" is Not a Legal Defence

Chinese Government to Crack Down on Underage Thinking


News in Pictures

Bill Clinton Pledges to Undo Key Mistakes of Laura Bush Legacy 


Blair Applies for EU President Job in Desperate Bid to Make Ends Meet

Tragic Boy Stopped, Looked But Failed to Listen

BBC Cutbacks Mean Daily Fortnight Write-Up Not as Long as it Could Be



 













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Tragic Boy Stopped, Looked but Failed to Listen
By Larry Grayskin 15-Jan-2008
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iPods are not compatible with the Green Cross Code
Eyewitnesses have revealed that a boy killed in a road accident had stopped, looked, but failed to listen before walking into the path of an oncoming truck. Local boy, Jermaine Best, was reportedly "too busy listening to tunes on his iPod" to complete all three tenets of the Green Cross Code.

Residents in the local area have expressed their profound shock at the news, with Jermaine's teacher Ellie Hogan declaring "I can't believe how thoughtless the young can be". Others looked suitably downcast in front of the local media as news of his death filtered through the village.

Jermaine's distraught mother, Gladys, told reporters, "he only got that iPod for Christmas...it wasn't even insured".

Paramedics who arrived on the scene have revealed that Jermaine's iPod had been playing Willie Nelson's On The Road Again before it too was pronounced dead.

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© Daily Fortnight News Corporation

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