Health Secretary Andrew Burnham today unveiled a bold new scheme set up by his department that is expected to create up to 1.4 million new jabs for people looking to return to workable levels of health.
In a surprise address before Parliament this morning, Mr Burnham said that the landmark measures were taken in direct response to rising levels of jablessness, following a large outbreak of swine flu across the UK and most of the globe.
He said: "This bill will have significant benefits for anyone who is actively looking for a jab, or who may be thinking about posting a jab application in the near future".
The announcement comes after the revelation that almost 2,000,000 British citizens remain jabless, despite the creation of benefits services such as Jab Seekers Allowance.
"As a department, we are committed to providing the people of this country with complete jab security, so that each and every person feels confident that their jab is theirs for life," continued Burnham. "These measures should go a long way to ensuring that".
The announcement should come as a welcome relief to the nation's sick; some of whom have applied for numerous jabs over the past several months with little success. Local man Dennis Gallen says he has applied to at least four different prospective doctors, but all of them were suitably unimpressed with the 34-year-old's inability to provide an extensive jab history.
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